Go Bulls!

(Week 16, day 6)
  I have a lot to talk about from the past week so let's get started. But first, I want to share a joke with you all. Here it is:
A biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice the Lord said "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want." The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of some thing that would honor and glorify me." The biker thought about it for some time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, why she snaps at me, what she means when she says nothing is wrong, and how I can make her truly happy!" After a brief pause The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"
  I laughed at that one for about 5 minutes. So anyway, that brings me to week 16. I thought I had it down, but my title as the cement man has to be revoked because Tanisha went off on me twice this week and I wasn't able to smooth over either one of them. Our first encounter came during one fine evening I was helping her make her lunch for the next day. Well really I was helping myself. You see she will often wake me up in the morning because she forgot to make her lunch the night before. So in order to save myself an unnecessary trip out of bed I will either remind her to make her lunch or I'll take some initiative and do it myself. Since she has to eat healthy I make sure she has enough fruits and vegetables. She likes mangoes so I decided I would cut one up for her. Well I've never cut a mango for her so I wasn't sure how she wanted it. I started asking questions which were apparently not the right questions to ask because she started getting annoyed. I say this after looking back because while I was asking them I was completely oblivious to her rising temper. Finally after getting it peeled I started to cut it, but there was something in the mango (not the pit) that was making it hard to cut all the way through. I was trying to figure out what it was. I invited Tanisha into the discussion to see if she could help me solve my problem. Apparently she wanted no part of this and after about 1 minute of a one-sided discussion she yells at me, "Forget the damn mango! I don't want the mango anymore! Just throw it away, I don't care!" Unfortunately a few exclamation points don't really describe the anger my wife had at me and that mango, but I assure you it was strong and it was real.
  The second incident happened when I was trying to get Staci ready for a slumber party she was going to. This one wasn't funny at all so I'm not going to go into detail but the end of it resulted in her yelling at me about forgetting some things she asked me to do. I have to remind myself that her hormones really give her an extra edge of anger because I always want to yell back. I have to tell any man who wants to make a baby with his wife, take some classes, read the bible or start meditating. Do SOMETHING to help yourself gain patience because when the time comes, you will need it. Luckily I do remember (too late) after she has finished ripping my head off that it's not a smart idea to provoke her. Now I don't want to give the impression that my wife is a ticking time bomb waiting to go off. Nor is she an evil monster lurking in corners waiting to strike at me when I least expect it. The majority of the time she is pleasant and fun to be around. We are enjoying this pregnancy a great deal. It's just some of the yelling stories are funny so they make their way into the blog pretty easily.

  I don't remember if I've mentioned this but I think that just the mental preparation I'm going through to get myself ready for another child has made my relationship with Staci better. I've been much more patient with her and have made sure to make time so that we do things together. Partially I'm fueled by fear that I'll somehow scar Staci by the way I react (or even worse DON'T react) to her after Baby Cohen is born. I know this wont happen, but hey it's helping our relationship so I'm not going to stop that just to get rid of a little healthy fear. She has done fabulously so far. I thought she would start acting a little more needy or babyish but she's mostly reacted the opposite. She's always been a child who wants a lot of attention so that hasn't changed much, but I'm not worried she's going to start regressing once the baby is born. As long as we include her in activities like feeding, diaper changing, playing and bedtime she will be happy. I've said it before she's going to be a great big sister. Besides including her in all those things makes her the perfect babysitter-in-training. Hey there's nothing wrong with looking into the future. Recently Staci had a surgery (very minor, she was back home the same day) and I was there to take her to the hospital, comfort her before she went in, carry her into the house, and spoil her with computer, TV and McDonalds. I love all of it. I love an excuse to spoil her rotten. I would do it every day if I knew it wouldn't ruin her (darn necessary future life skills!). It makes me think of how much I will enjoy being able to take care of TWO kids. This is what I was made for. I love being a father. This is the time of my life, and I'm glad I'm able to document it because in a year or so I'm sure someone will remind me I said this and I will call them a name unfit to print and tell them they are crazy. Then they'll tell me to visit foytime.blogspot.com. Curse you Google and your easily navigated online tools!

  I told you there was a lot to discuss. I'm almost done here. I just wanted to mention that so far I have had no idea what to expect from this. Despite that I don't remember ever soliciting advice from anyone yet. I think this is because I want this to be MY experience. I know there's some great advice out there, even some that would make my life a hell of a lot easier, but I'm enjoying this so much I don't mind when something goes wrong. I'm taking it as it comes and I can't tell you how much of a stress relief that has been. I know raising a child is hard. I know babies demand a lot of money and attention. I know pregnancy can be hard on a woman and even dangerous. Does that mean I should dwell on all of that? No. I'm determined to remember as much of my wife's pregnancy as I can, and that means not worrying about things that haven't happened and may not happen. It means writing down my thoughts. It means pampering my demanding, spoiled wife and loving it. It means looking at my wife's belly every day and marveling at what's going on inside it. It means watching the NBA Playoffs with the sound off while I'm blogging in the bed so my wife doesn't wake up alone. It means sitting in the bed reading "You Having a Baby" out loud. I want to remember it all and feel like I was participating in it, not just watching it happen in front of me. Now if only we started taking some pictures.